Monday, July 11, 2016

5 Ways I Pray for My Future Husband

Happy Monday!!

In the past, I've shied away from writing on guy/girl relationship topics. One reason being I've never been in a guy/girl relationship, so anything I say feels like just pounding out third-person observations as factual. For another reason, my 'What He Must Be' list has changed more than twice since I first drafted it up at age 16, so I might be more wishy-washy than I care to flaunt and publish.

But one thing that I do feel somewhat versed in is praying for my future husband.

I would love to get married someday. Set up a little house with hand-sewn curtains and vintage bakeware and a coop full of chickens and a big garden and a bunch of toe-headed kids running around. I'm not too picky on location as long as I have a decent view of the sunset.

Sometimes I get kind of caught up in my daydreams, and prayer is the one thing that always helps me get my feet back on the ground to focus on the here and now.

Wherever you are, be all there.
-Jim Elliot

Here are just five ways that I pray for my future husband.

1. I Pray for Him Spiritually

Despite my wishes and dreams, it is God's will that all men be saved, and to come unto the knowledge of the truth (1 Timothy 2:4). If he is not saved, I pray that the Holy Spirit would prick his heart continuously until he gets the matter resolved, and that if he is saved, he would always purpose to grow in God through prayer, Bible reading, and church attendance.

2. I Pray for Him Mentally

It's a pretty wide category, but then again, the brain is a pretty vast place. I pray that he would avoid debt, and learn responsibility in finances. I pray that he would save his heart for me, and keep his eyes focused on Christ. I pray for him to keep any promises he's made. I pray for him to seek wise counsel before making important decisions.

3. I Pray for Him Physically

I pray for his health. I pray for his safety.

4. I Pray for Him Relationally

If he can't get along with the people already in his life, he's not going to be ready for me, now is he? I pray that he learn how to love his family, learn what it means to truly forgive, learn to how to give 100%, and learn to work thanklessly.

5. I Pray for His Growth

I pray, not for a man exactly like myself, but instead for a man with a teachable spirit, and a desire to always be a better Christian. It's not so imperative to me that he's rich and equals my love for Oreos, as much as I just really pray that he grows; he gets better; he improves and desires improvement. He grows Spiritually, Mentally, and Relationally. Alive things should grow. And bear fruit.

And then, I Pray the Same for Myself.

I pray that I would always purpose to grow in and closer to God. I pray that I would grow in my self, and continue learning the many things God has for me to learn while on this earth. I pray that I would stay healthy and safe, and even for my health to improve, as I'm sure it can. I pray that I grow closer in love with my family, friends, and foes. I pray that I will improve in teachableness (it's hard to be wrong sometimes), and always bear fruit of righteousness.

While he might be perfect compared to my prayers, and growing, too, if I'm not, I am entirely unworthy of his love, aren't I?

We wait around for Mr. Darcy, and cry our hearts out when he passes us by, when we have quite unfortunately forgotten that we are the Lydia in this story.

You are never as eligible as you think you are.
-Jasmine Bauchem

After your pride brushes itself off after that blow, try something for me, will you?

Pray for your future husband.

Pray for yourself. (Remember that God gives you the patience you prayed for by giving you situations that require extra patience.)

And always for the ultimate design that you come closer to God through such prayers!

How do you pray for your future spouse? 

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  1. Um, aren't you taking it for granted that you will get married? What if God doesn't have a husband for you? Who are you praying for? There are a lot of girls that don't get married. :)
    I enjoy reading your thoughts!

    1. You know what? Maybe I am taking it for granted.

      I really have a deep faith in Genesis 2, when God created woman for man. I don't believe God created man and then He created woman, and just said "okay, I mean if you want to work together, go for it". It was God's purpose all along for togetherness, and He is the one who ordained the family unit.

      I, personally, do believe I am called to be a wife and mother, so I am preparing for that now, the best I can. Thus, prayer. :)

      However, if that desire God planted in my heart to marry is not to be fulfilled, but He is rather to glory in that in its unfulfillment, I will have no regrets about time spent talking to my Heavenly Father.

      But, in all, to answer your question more directly, I always hope uncertainties about my future do continue to push me towards God. Then, if I do die with never having married (tomorrow or in 80 years), I'll be in heaven at the feet of my Heavenly Father I've spent all this time with, and it won't matter anymore. I wrote this post to encourage young ladies out there wondering and pining away about their potential future husbands to turn their burden over to God in prayer. Prayer is more the focus than the future husband part. :)

      Thank you for commenting, Olivia! You have some good questions!

    2. Kimberly ---
      Yes, I completely agree about Genesis!!! Woman was created to be with man! (Although it does make one wonder why so many are single and serving in that respect too!)
      I've been struggling with "callings." How do you know what your calling is? What is a calling?
      I am usually pretty full of questions ;) Thanks for replying!

    3. Hi again, Olivia!

      I've actually been studying a bit on eunuchs over the past couple years and it does answer a lot of questions on singleness and how God has set some people apart for Himself. If it's a topic you'd be interested in, I would recommend 'Born That Way After All', even though I have not been able to read it myself, yet.

      A call, at least to me, is like a call to action. If I say "rise up and fight", I am calling you to action, but there is no guarantee you'll move, and you are not necessarily "in trouble" if you don't obey. The Great Commission is a calling for all Christians.

      A promise is a sure thing. God promises He'll never leave us nor forsake us.

      God does not promise anyone a spouse. Even though He could see our whole lives before we were born, I am of the mind He doesn't necessarily pick out a specific person we are to marry. Not one person is promised for us. But the innate pull within me/us to continue replenishing the earth (Gen. 1:28), is a calling, and one I believe I am supposed to be apart of.

      [As a side note, I think it's not wrong to desire marriage and children, but our guard has to be to not awaken love before its time. (Song 8:4)]

      Also, I can see it in my life where God has prepared me specifically for a future with little kids (probably). Not many 20 year olds I know have been around toddlers literally every single day of their lives. ;)

      I think focusing on today's callings is way more important than worrying what tomorrow's might be, overall. For example, the Great Commission would be today's calling. Serving wherever you find yourself right now, would be today's calling. Making sure to spend time alone with God, would be today's calling. If the big picture is blurry, just leave it to handle itself and focus on where God has you right now, and do your best here (Colo. 3:23-24)—that really helps me! :)

  2. Hello!
    So, I've read some ideas on blogs about writing letters, journals, or boxes of things for your future husband.. Do you do any of those things? I've been considering a journal because I have a hard time keeping up with things that aren't attached if you know what I mean. ;) But how do you write or what do you write to someone that you've likely never met?
    Sorry if I went overboard on the questions especially since they are not super closely related to the post. I was curious of your input. Thanks for this post. I know it was posted a long time ago, but I really like it!


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