Monday, June 27, 2016

She Reached For My Hand: Lessons I'm Learning in Big-Sisterhood

Do you remember when your dad first took you to an empty parking lot and talked you through the basics of how to operate a vehicle? Do you remember not feeling certain on if you're seeing what you're supposed to be seeing out all your mirrors? The adrenaline mixed with anxiety pumping through your veins as you take on your first Interstate on-ramp?

Yeah, the first time I drove on a not-in-my-neighborhood road, I ran a red light. And the library parking lot was never quite big nor empty enough to be truly ideal for practicing my backing.

Good memories.

But what if you (or I) could have done just one more maneuver, one more switch of a stick or push of a button and been guaranteed safety? What if there was just one thing missing from our operations that could have promised us a safe journey? Would you have pressed that button or switched that lever?

Well, maybe you're a stunt guy that loves that sort of thing. But for this can-barely-climb-ladders kind of girl, the answer is easy: yes. I definitely would have pushed that button. Obviously. I'm not afraid of dying, but I'd rather not kill my entire family by running this 12 passenger van off the bridge today.

I know this is an unusual style of intro, even for me, but just tonight, as I was babysitting my littlest sister during the church service (which entails carrying her, bouncing her, helping her drink from the water fountain, helping her get hand sanitizer, making faces with her in the bathroom mirrors, and letting her drag me all over Creation), I recognized a change in her.

Just last week she was Ms. Independent, confident in her newly-discovered talent of walking, and challenging the stairs, concrete, and backyard at every opportunity.

But tonight, as she was dragging me around Eastland Baptist Church (it's just way too big to be drug around in), and we came to a staircase that she wanted to mount, she reached up for my hand.

Not so I would hold her. Not that kind of reach.

But just because she wanted to hold my hand.

She's learned something in the last week or two about walking: it's dangerous. She falls, scrapes her knees up, gets dusty and dirty, and cries. And she's learned that holding someone's hand is protection. It's like the one extra button to push so that she can do whatever it is she wants to do (let's face it, she's wrapped around our fingers), but she's not going to fall. While it might be less convenient to have her arm sticking straight up, trapped into mine, she's willing to pull that extra lever for guaranteed safety.

That reminds me a little of myself, though...

Like walking is for a toddler, life is for me: it's dangerous.

I'm falling, failing, scraping my knees, and just not always strutting around like I totally thought I could. I cry. Not as often as she, but if the scrapes are deep enough...

Sure, I'm blessed. Blessed beyond measure. But life is still hard. And I know so, so many hurting people that have it that much worse.

As she learns to hold my hand, I'm learning to hold God's.

Sweet little Katherin has made great strides these past few weeks.

Wish I learned that fast.

But that little girl is teaching me things, too.

Like while she's learning that she needs to grip my hand as hard as she possibly can for ultimate protection, I should be gripping God's hand as hard as I possibly can, for ultimate protection. For ultimate growth. For ultimate blessings.

And not just because I have to, either.

Katherin did not reluctantly pull away from me when I grabbed her hand to protect her at the base of those church stairs.

She reached for my hand.

What am I doing to reach for His?

But if from thence thou shalt seek the LORD thy God, thou shalt find [him], if thou seek him with all thy heart and with all thy soul.
-Deuteronomy 4:29


  1. Elizabeth WilliamsJune 28, 2016 at 9:47 AM

    This is SO good! It definitely speaks to my heart, as I'm going through a situation where I'm just having to cling to the Lord! Glad for your insights ;)

    1. Aww, thanks for your kind words, dear!! Praying for you!! <3


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